Through the Looking Glass
Now if you'd asked MY advice, I'd have said “Leave off at seven"—but it's too late now.”
“I never ask advice about growing,” Alice said indignantly.
“Too proud?” the other inquired.
Alice felt even more indignant at this suggestion. “I mean,” she said, “that one can't help growing older.”
“ONE can't, perhaps,” said Humpty Dumpty, “but TWO can. With proper assistance, you might have left off at seven.”
“What a beautiful belt you've got on!” Alice suddenly remarked.
(They had had quite enough of the subject of age, she thought: and if they really were to take turns in choosing subjects, it was her turn now.) “At least,” she corrected herself on second thoughts, “a beautiful cravat, I should have said—no, a belt, I mean—I beg your pardon!” she added in dismay, for Humpty Dumpty looked thoroughly offended, and she began to wish she hadn't chosen that subject. “If I only knew,” the thought to herself, 'which was neck and which was waist!”
Evidently Humpty Dumpty was very angry, though he said nothing for a minute or two. When he DID speak again, it was in a deep growl.
“It is a—MOST—PROVOKING—thing,” he said at last, “when a person doesn't know a cravat from a belt!”
“I know it's very ignorant of me,” Alice said, in so humble a tone that Humpty Dumpty relented.
“It's a cravat, child, and a beautiful one, as you say. It's a present from the White King and Queen. There now!”
“Is it really?” said Alice, quite pleased to find that she HAD chosen a good subject, after all.
“They gave it me,” Humpty Dumpty continued thoughtfully, as he crossed one knee over the other and clasped his hands round it, “they gave it me—for an un-birthday present.”
“I beg your pardon?” Alice said with a puzzled air.
“I'm not offended,” said Humpty Dumpty.
“I mean, what IS an un-birthday present?”
“A present given when it isn't your birthday, of course.”
Alice considered a little. “I like birthday presents best,” she said at last.
“You don't know what you're talking about!” cried Humpty Dumpty. “How many days are there in a year?
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There was once a king who was very powerful. He had great influence over the wild beasts and animals. Now the tortoise was looked upon as the wisest of all beasts and men. This king had a son named Ekpenyon, to whom he gave fifty young girls as wives, but the prince did not like any of them. The king was very angry at this, and made a law that if any man had a daughter who was finer than the prince's wives, and who found favour in his son's eyes, the girl herself and her father and mother should be killed.
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