Aunt Jane's Nieces Abroad
I will ask you
to explain to us, sir, the brutal suggestion you have just advanced."
Uncle John laughed. In the days when Major Doyle had thought him a poor
man and in need of a helping hand, the grizzled old Irishman had been as
tender toward him as a woman and studiously avoided any speech or
epithet that by chance might injure the feelings of his dead wife's
only brother. But the Major's invariable courtesy to the poor or
unfortunate was no longer in evidence when he found that John Merrick
was a multi-millionaire with a strongly defined habit of doing good to
others and striving in obscure and unconventional ways to make everybody
around him happy. His affection for the little man increased mightily,
but his respectful attitude promptly changed, and a chance to reprove or
discomfit his absurdly rich brother-in-law was one of his most
satisfactory diversions. Uncle John appreciated this, and holding the
dignified Major in loving regard was glad to cross swords with him now
and then to add variety to their pleasant relations.
"It's this way, Major Doyle," he now remarked, coolly. "I've been
worried to death, lately, over business matters; and I need a change."
"Phoo! All your business is attended to by Isham, Marvin & Co. You've no
worry at all. Why, we've just made you a quarter of a million in C.H. &
D's."
The "we" is explained by stating that the Major held an important
position in the great banking house--a position Mr. Merrick had secured
for him some months previously.
"That's it!" said Uncle John. "You've made me a quarter of a million
that I don't want. The C.H. & D. stocks were going to pieces when I
bought them, and I had reason to hope I'd lose a good round sum on them.
But the confounded luck turned, and the result is an accumulation of all
this dreadful money. So, my dear Major, before I'm tempted to do
some-other foolish thing I've determined to run away, where business
can't follow me, and where by industry and perseverance I can scatter
some of my ill-gotten gains.
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In a village there lived two men who had the self-same name. Both were named Claus. But one of them owned four horses, and the other owned only one horse; so to distinguish between them people called the man who had four horses Big Claus, and the man who had only one horse Little Claus. Now I'll tell you what happened to these two, for this is a true story.
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